Hello and welcome to my blog. I'll just share my own stories that i think it will be fine to shared here. Too busy to update everyday or i can say that maybe im to shy to share my honest thought. Feel free to be here. Thanks for the visit.
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ONE AND TWO
Tuesday 1 September 2020 at 22:16
The only ONE mistake i made in my life, Sacrificed my future for my parents. And this ONE mistake, this ONE step is making my life messier and harder day by day. Regret? Yes, very much. I didn’t feel like this before but nowadays things have been going upside down. I can’t control my feelings. But it’s okay!! I got this!! Everything happens for a reason, ALLAH is with me.
TWO Left something I shouldn’t, Because of my parents too, I don’t want to betray them, I made promise so I should keep it, Parents can control us in everything I guess, But when it comes to feeling, it’s quite hard, It have been a year but I can still get teary eyes when I think about it, But the memories makes me laugh so hard sometimes, But still cried a river for it. It have been a year and my heart still aches whenever I think about it. But I’m thankful tho, i guess ALLAH protected me.
A song that I can totally relate
at 21:22
Assalamualaikum To My Youth by Bol4 At some point, I used to wish I would disappear from this world,
The whole world seemed so dark and I cried every night,
Will I feel better if I just disappeared?I was so afraid of everyone's eyes on me.
During this beautifully beautiful days, I was in pain, I hated myself for not being able to receive love, My mom and dad, they're looking at me, It's not how i really feel but i keep getting farther away.
What do I do?
The saying time is medicine was really true for me, As the days went by, I really got better, But sometimes, when I'm too happy, I'm afraid I'll be in pain again, I'm afraid that someone will take away this happiness.
Those beautifully beautiful memories were so painful, I was hurting and hurting but the pain wouldn't go away, My friends, all these people, they're only looking at me, This isn't how I really am but I keep getting farther away.
But still, maybe I can be, A bright light in this world, Maybe after all of the pain, I can shortly shine a light, So I couldn't give up, I couldn't fall asleep peacefully for a single night, Because maybe if I keep trying to get up like this, I will find myself.
I could never explain how this song really meant to me, every time i felt so down, I would listen so this song, and i couldn't control my tears from falling. It means a lot to me.
Life
at 19:40
Assalamualaikum Well, life is full of surprises and not always it would come in a good way! Sometimes we might be lucky as the surprise would make us happy but sometimes yeah we just have to accept something that we would never want to happen in our life. Let me tell a story. I struggled with myself for a long time moving on to accept the fact I would be only getting married to the person my parents chose not my choice. I am not able to motivate myself for marriage because of that. I knew something is really off with this marriage thing I can't find a reason to accept the fact I should fall in love with a random person they ask me to marry. Every single time any guy's family asks for me I'll ask my parents to cut it off, I would not listen to them anything about the guy. I couldn't explain why, but something doesn't feel right for me. I knew that I should accept the fact I have to get married even I'm saying no for now but idk how to explain this feeling. I feel like arrange marriage is like putting my life on the toss, heads I win, tail I lose, what if I get the bad guy? What if that is not the life I want. I can't just run away after right? I want to get married to a person that I know his bad and good behavior. Arrange marriage is just to risky. I always do think getting married to someone we don't know is tough. But whenever I look at my parents, I feel opposite, they're are one of the best couple I could have ever seen in my life. It have been more than 20 years and they're still madly in love with each other. They're sweet, loving, they do fight but they would be fine after few minutes. My mom is really understanding, she is the best, even when my dad is not in the mood, stressed out, she would be always be by his side. They had arranged marriage too. They had been together in all the sorrows and happiness, they're the best example I have and be the only reason I still accepting the fact I would have an arranged marriage. I'll update here if I did able to go through an arranged marriage!
Hati
Friday 8 November 2019 at 22:38
Assalamualaikum
Kadang kala,
Sekeras batu,
Kadang kala,
Selembut kapas. Ya Allah, lembutkanlah hatiku.
A not so love story
at 22:14
Assalamualaikum,
Storytime :)
A unromantic not so love story between two college students. It began when this girl was a new student, everything was strange to her, she was quiet and shy to talk to others, she was so lonely and had no idea what was going on as they are students who just finished high school, everything was new to them, the college system and stuff. But, this one guy helped her to get comfortable from the day one, he helped her in everything, he arranged everything for her. Both of them become best friends since that day.
Little did she know, the guy was already have feelings for her, the guy started to become clingy, sweet, protective towards her. Days to months, both of them became inseparable, they studied & scored top together, attended a lot of programs together, countless time doing assignments, projects and stuffs like that together. All was just okay until the guy planned to confess her with a bouquet of flowers. The super confused girl, who had zero love feelings towards him started to feel super guilty and uncomfortable around him.
Later on, she avoided that guy badly, ignored his messages and calls for a week. Then, the guy managed to meet her up and slow talked to her & said it’s okay to reject him, we can be just friends, he was cool about it and all. After that incident, he acted like nothing happened which make this girl started to feel confused about her feeling because she can’t stop thinking about him. He was on her mind 24/7.
To add, this guy was okay with the rejection but he didn’t give up on her as he continued to being a super sweet boy bestfriend to her. Too many sweet little surprise with sweet poems and flowers and foods and his gentle behaviour started to make her heart melt. The girl wanted to be with this guy, as she couldn’t meet someone better than him ever after. But she can’t really be in a relationship. It’s forbidden for her to do so. She talked to the guy abt her situation and guess what this gentleman understood everything abt her and was willing to be okay with it.
Which means they stayed just friends until both of them are in their 20s, finished studies and ready to be in a relationship openly, without hiding to both of their families. Months to years, everything was just going good. Both of them finished college, they have to go back home, no more staying at dorms, no more time together. The guy gifted a really nice shoe to the girl with a cute lil card saying see you soon!! Good luck to our future. But little he did know, that was the last time ever he could see her.
She died.
The end
Acted mature
Friday 27 September 2019 at 23:52
I just acted mature, that's all.
I had to react that way to unburden you.
That way, you'd feel less guilty.
But do you know that?
To tell the truth, i didn't want to be like this.
No tittle
at 03:46
Reminder for myself, Jika sesuatu itu baik untukmu, maka Allah akan mendekatkannya dengan kamu.
tetapi jika itu tidak baik untukmu, maka Allah akan menjauhkannya darimu.
Online shopping
Tuesday 24 September 2019 at 01:06
Assalamualaikum
I'm becoming an online shopping monster, I'm seriously wasting a lot of money nowadays. I can see that, whenever I find a break time, I'm scrolling through an online shopping platform and adding stuff to my cart, It became a habit, a very bad one. Until I realized I hardly save money nowadays as my future saving as I did since I was 7.
I have strictly warned myself to bring down my bad habits. Since that, I tried to find solution for this. The few things I found I can do with the money I have so I don't waste it on online shopping is, first of all I deleted some apps I often buy clothes and bags, as I already have enough of that things for now. Next is, I list the things I want badly and only buy it want I really really want it, not because I was bored. I also do add to cart and just wait, lol. I wait for discount or sale so I can save money. Yup, I'm trying really hard. I also did create another saving account in my bank account, so I save money in the form of fixed deposit monthly. I'm also learning about buying digital gold on online platform. You tube really do teach us so many things we don't learn in school. I have a lot of interest in buying gold as our saving and investment. But, I still have to learn and got to know about it fully before I start an gold investment, to make sure I don't lose anything and earn profit somehow.
Hopefully, this all helps me overcome my online shopping addiction.
Chocolate chips cookies ala subway
at 01:03
Assalamualaikum & hi
Every time nampak subway je mesti singgah beli cookies dia. Memang super sedap & family saya semua suka cookies dia.
So at first saya tried to buat resepi sendiri & hasilnya kurang memuaskan, kalau baling cookies tu kepala orang boleh pecah. Keras nak mati. Patahlah gigi kalau makan cookies tu. Then, 2nd try saya adjust resepi dari YouTube, It's from an Indonesian lady, Kueh kering chip cookies. Oleh sebab dah tengok terlalu banyak resepi saya sendiri dah confius ni resepi dari siapa, tak ingat, tengok history pun pening.
All the things you need :
90g gula kastor
155g gula perang
1 sk garam
115g buttercup
155g tepung gandum
1/2 sk baking powder
1 biji telur
1 sk esen vanila
chocolate chip
Procedure :
- Campak campak je, yang penting chocolate chip tu masuk last & the dough tu need to be chilled 30min baru senang sikit nak buat bentuk bulat.
- Preheat 180 dc & bakar 12min
Tips : Add brown sugar to make it chewier
Resepi : Kek gula hangus paling simple & senang
Friday 13 September 2019 at 23:37
Assalamualaikum,
My Atta's fav, so i tried, guna resepi Seminit di Youtube, now it became my Amma's fav too :)
Bahan-bahan:
1 cawan tepung gandum ( diayak )
1 cawan susu cair
1 sudu kecik soda bikarbonat ( diayak )
4 biji telur
125 gram butter cup
1 1/2 cawan gula
Cara-caranya :
1. Pukul 4 biji telur, masukkan 1 cawan susu cair.
2. Masukkan 1 cawan tepung gandum, 1 sk soda bikarbonat.
3. Pukul sampai sebati.
Gula hangus :
1. Masukkan 1 1/2 cawan gula pasir, api perlahan.
2. Kacau supaya gula tak melekat dekat kuali.
3. Lepas gula cair, masukkan 1 cawan air yang mendidih.
4. Kacau, kacau, kacau, masukkan 125g buttercup.
5. Masukkan dalam adunan tepung tadi.
Dah campur dua dua tu tadi, kacau sampai sebati, kukus selama 1 jam.
Tips:
Nak kek gula hangus ni menjadi dia punya sarang semut dia, tuang gula hangus tu masa panas2 dalam adunan, tak payah perap, memang 100% jadi. InshaAllah.
A poem
at 23:12
Assalamualaikum
I saw a poem in Facebook today, and I fell in love.
If your sins are the size of mountain, Always remember HIS rahma is like, The water that creates those humble canyons,
Do not despair, He is the forgiving, The ever pardoning,
If your pain is deeper than t he rifts beneath the surface of the earth Always remember after every hardship There is ease, Do not despair,
Positive
at 23:08
Assalamualaikum
Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world.
Today, I'm wise so I'm changing myself
<3
Remember
Monday 9 September 2019 at 23:46
Assalamualaikum
I need to always remember this on thing, key to be a better person, day by day, nothing is more important than, a person who is willing to admit that, we are not always right, and I'm willing to do that, I'm not always right.
Patient
at 23:45
Assalamualaikum
The greatest lesson you can teach yourself is to be patient. Be patient when you're happy because happiness ends, and be patient when you're sad because sadness too ends. Nothing is constant. Everything is temporary, expect Allah, The only Everlasting.
Rindu
at 08:14
They say there is a reason They say time will heal Neither time or reason Will change the way I feel Gone are the days But in my heart You are always there The gates of memories Will never close I miss you more than anybody know.
Al fatihah to my beloved appa cantik Sesungguhnya rindu yang paling sakit adalah rindu pada orang yang dah meninggal dunia,
No tittle
at 00:40
Assalamualaikum
Rahsia orang, aku bakal bawak sampai mati -
Rahsia yang buat aku tak tenteram,
Tidur aku tak lena.
Hati aku sakit bagai tertusuk duri.
Terluka, pedih, kecewa.
Semua ada!
Jika aku cerita pada orang lain,
Walau ianya demi aku,
Kerana aku bagaikan depresi,
Bukan untukku buka aib dia,
Hidup bagai tidak bermakna bila ku tahu,
Rahsia dia, buatku binasa bersama.
Apakan daya, terpaksaku simpan rahsia ini kekubur :)
Untung kita, Allah tutup aib kita didunia.
Sweet sour
at 00:02
Assalamualaikum
You are a story, A little paragraph story that came to my life, A story I would tell my future children, How it felt like, Sweet and sour, Bitter and twisted.
My siblings
Wednesday 14 August 2019 at 19:35
Assalamualaikum
Bende yg saya nak sangat in future is good relationship with my beloved siblings. Saya nak kami semua sama macam sekarang, saling menyayangi antara satu sama lain. Even kitorang ada gaduh, itu kira bende biasalah, gaduh gaduh manja je. Harini gaduh, esok berbaik :) So, i want this forever. Bukan dengan adik beradik kandung je, dengan adik beradik saudara pun nak stay macam sekarang. Because our relationship is too precious, i appreciate every single moment in my life i spent with them.
I can say that I have an extremely good relationship with my siblings. I'm 20 year old female and have a sister 2 years older than me and 3 more brothers with a huge gap of years with me. I have close relationship with all of them but I'm closest to my small little brother, of course. Everyday after his school he comes into my room to just talk to me about his and my day. He is so kind and very mature for his age. We both have the same perspective on life so that's why I believe we are so close. He always says the nicest thing to me, kind hearted too. I love my other two brothers too, but nowadays I can feel that there are some gap between us. It's a little complicated. When they were little kids they used to follow my lead, but the older they got, they developed their own idea, the farther apart we got. I understand. Even we don't see eyes to eyes in many topic but there are few things that bring us together. We share a completely opposite brothers sisters relationship. We typically fight on everything but when time comes we stand together. My relationship my sister is pretty good, she is a very quite type, she is in her own world always, sometimes I feel like she is my little sister for me. I should have born first. We are like friends gossip and do shopping together. We rarely fight.
We aren't perfect and we love each other's imperfections because that is the one of the prime reasons why you need your siblings. I do something wrong, they scold me, I get angry, I realize my mistake. I approach them and say sorry, hugs and so on and also same goes to them. It is very common between us.
A relationship no matter how much we fight among ourselves but ones someone come against one of us, we are united. I really hope we stay as now forever after even after all of us got married, have our own family, our relationship should stay as good as now.
A relationship where we plan to trouble our mom together. A relationship where we embarrass each other intentionally. A lot more that I could not ever put it into words.
No one is perfect but I'm okay to ignore all the other faults because they're my blood.
Sin
Sunday 4 August 2019 at 00:19
Assalamualaikum,
We all sin,Every single one of us do sin, Nobody is perfect, We are trying to, We do mistake, We repent, Stop thinking you're above everyone else, Don't treat others like they are insignificant, A person who is down today can climb up tomorrow, Only the Almighty knows what the future holds.
I'm addicted
Saturday 3 August 2019 at 23:53
Assalamualaikum
My very first k-drama is You're Beautiful, I started watching it when I was very young, I was just 13 at that time. I had a great experience of watching it. That drama made me fall in love with Korean drama. Especially oppa, there are a lot of handsome man in Korea!! It was the main reason why I became addicted to k-drama.
Thereafter, I started watching every Korean drama that I came across and within a time period of 2 days I can complete a full completed 24 episodes of a drama. How crazy! I wouldn't eat or either sleep, I'll just focus on the drama. I didn't realize that I wasted a lot of my precious time of mine watching dramas though they were very entertaining that wasn't proper time to watch them all. I felt like I find my happiness in other world of drama that doesn't even exist, where I and my favorite character only present in that particular world, letting it take my mind and heart. At that moment, I realized that k-drama became my addiction. So I decided to overcome it by slowly. It was not easy, it may seem easy to do so but it to be honest it was really hard. Those time when I felt I should marathon whole drama, I convinced my mind not to do so. Instead I watch it with limit, 1 episode per day. Now, I still do watch k-drama but in control. It's not like you need to stop everything you like to save time, instead you should do it in a controlled way.
I'll just have fun watching handsome oppa and pretty unnies!! because my life is kind of boring and stress at the same time at least k-drama do give a little spark in my life.
Disappointed
at 23:47
Assalamualaikum,
So today,
Just after a few heartbreak without gap,
I'm disappointed again.
Wow, what a month!
Full of surprises,
That i didn't even ask.
July 2019 will be remembered as the worst month ever,
Heartbreak over heartbreak,
There were nothing special in this month,
There were no good news at all.
I'm tired,
Mentally & physically,
Crying,
Again & again.
It is no such things that i have no one to share,
I have a good listener,
But i want to keep it with me, forever.
Yesterday i was shocked because of my "friend's" problem,
But it had already happened,
So i can't do anything.
Urm, and today I'm still in shock because of someone,
But much more to disappointment, i was only shocked for a few moment, and yeaa~
Sad.
My chest had a really weird feeling, i was really in pain,
No words to describe,
But i tried my best to solve it & hoping for the best,
And i still believe the "someone", no matter what he do, i will correct it, for his/her better future.
I love you now & forever
Healing
Wednesday 24 July 2019 at 19:46
Assalamualaikum
How I mend a heart broken heart, Pain, It's getting harder to hide, It's even harder to explain, It's never easy, I have to be strong and forge ahead, Put a smile on my face as I walk out the door,
I cry all the time now, I used to think I was strong, Now It's a struggle just to hold on, To make it through the day, Without someone asking if I'm okay.
I just need a plenty of time. As others have done before, Then I'll be able to start my normal life again, As happy as before.
Another Problem
Wednesday 17 July 2019 at 21:33
Assalamualaikum
When someone you trust betray you,
The feeling of betrayal,
It really hurt you know,
Don't trust people so easily,
Even it's your patner, siblings, relatives, friends.
I'm Just sayin,
I trust them tho,
That's the problem,
I hope nobody breaks my trust,
I just don't wanna be in pain.
To those who seek to change,
Please change with full of your heart,
Don't be like somebody i know,
"The somebody" pretended to change,
Then, we believe in things we see,
Then, betrayal, again and again.
Leaving scar....
Betrayal
Sunday 14 July 2019 at 19:39
Assalamualaikum
Yesterday night,
For the first time in my life,
I feel depressed,
I was in shock,
My hands were shakin,
Even it was not my fault,
I felt like everything was my fault.
Each betrayal begins with trust,
I trusted you, No, we trusted you,
You were like-
No,
Now i know, betrayal never comes from your enemies,
It's from people around you,
People that you trust,
Now, i have trust issues, thanks to you.
Moments by Christopher
Tuesday 25 June 2019 at 02:22
Assalamualaikum
A song that I have been listening on repeat nowadays, the lyrics just tackkk chua!!
Please don't say a word, cause they all have been said now, Like a journey coming to the end, You say, Let it run like the river, wild and without a care, Just like the days we were young and fumbling.
Everything fades away, let it go by the flow, Really wish i could stay, but you know me, All the moments we shared are not going anywhere, Never quite understood it when you told me, Just close your eyes and I be right by your side, Cause memories don't say goodbye.
Everything happens for a reason
Thursday 13 June 2019 at 20:41
There is a couple things a want to say,
Don't worry dear, don't worry,
Everything happens for a reason,
Don't you take it as a bad thing,
No, never.
As i said, everything happens for a reason,
And it is for a good reason,
It is because we pray to ALLAH,
To help us,
We pray to protect us from dangerous things,
We pray to a better future,
We pray for a beautiful life,
We pray for our health,
We pray for everyone & everything,
So here it is,
ALLAH is making it all happen,
All the beautiful things we asked for.
So sister,
Life can be hard sometimes,
But everything happens for a reason,
Don't ever surrender ❤
APPA CANTIK
at 19:26
Appa cantik,
That's how i call my grandpa.
11th of Jun 2019, 7th day of Eidulfitri,
We are all teary,
We lost him already,
A phone call that made us all go crazy,
He left us in his sleep peacefully.
A lot of beautiful memories,
Will be cherished,
Deep inside me,
A lot of good things,
Are all from him.
He starts his day with prayes & Quran,
His mouth never gets tired praising ALLAH,
All the good things he did,
Can never be listed.
All the nabi's story he told me,
Made me teary today.
Alfatihah to my appa cantik Haji Abdul Latheef bin Syed Ibrahim Shah.
Let it go
Monday 20 May 2019 at 01:42
Assalamualaikum
How to let go someone out of our mind and heart. I'm so confused seeked for help from online society, many gave me a lot of different ideas and advice which I would like to share here.
As you are in crush on someone and can't get it out of you system? They said time. That's it. Only time can help you. There is no on or off switch, time is the one and only option. It will fade away soon.
I don't know how long it going to take for you as for me, I haven't really moved on.
However, if a lot time passes and you are still feeling it, then you have a to look it back carefully.
Feelings are only less of what it make works. The rest depends on how well each other person deal with their own feelings and emotion. It is also mainly about the level of emotional maturity.
How do you move on? Understand that your feelings for them has become a habit, an addiction, in fact now you feel the withdrawal symptom. We want to do anything we could to end them and may feel so desperate about it.
Instead try to stay busy, but we have to feel relaxed, listen to some of your fav movie. Yes the more relaxed we are, the less we hurt, whether it is emotional or physical.
Understand that they are your habit and that cannot stop thoughts from rising up. You can control whether or not you dwell on them. When you start think about them, you say firmly I do that anymore and turn your attention somewhere else. You must create a new habit so you won't think about them.
As for feelings, the more we think someone else will permanently make us happy, the more miserable we are going to be. So even it feels impossible to tear them out, the key is distancing yourself from that person slowly. Suddenly cutting them off will only hurt you more or hurt the other person. Text them once in a while don't completely ghost them up. Try to have girls days out. Over time the feelings will fade away more and more before you know it, you are over them! Again it won't happen overnight, but you will be there. Hang in there thight!
I think actually I'm not qualified enough to share this here because i haven't really succeeded in this, hopefully soon.
RAYA 2019
Friday 17 May 2019 at 01:12
Assalamualaikum & hi
Today is officially 12 ramadhan which means we all can already feel the Raya vibes. It's quite a bit earlier right?
I don't know lah if you guys haven't feel the raya vibes yet (because maybe you're a student with exam stress and all). But for me, as I'm in a business industry, i guess? I totally in it! Raya!! We already got a lot of hampers & kuih raya from the companies & also my father's shop started selling variety types of kuih raya today (and there is a lot guys, i want to eat it alllll)
So, when because we are already in the raya vibes, i decided to make a lot of kuih raya this year. But i don't know if i will have enough time or not becase this year I'm hella busy with 2 shops. Plus, i want to khatam al Quran really soon. I have a lot of work but still i want to make kuih raya on my own. Baru betul betul raya kan? 😂 For me, I think Raya is not complete without homemade kuih raya!!! Here is my list of kuih raya i will be doing this year, later i will update whether i did manage to do it all or nah? And also i want to save my recepi here.
1. Butter cookies
2. Almond london
3. Semperit dahlia
4. Semperit
5. Cornfalkes
Being in love as a Muslim
Friday 10 May 2019 at 01:41
Assalamualaikum
Love feelings with the intention of marrying them and love without the intention of marrying is two different thing, totally. In my opinion, it is all about how you handle it, I'm saying this again firstly when we found someone we should make sure he or she is the one and with the intention of marrying them in mind we should consult our parents before it is too late. You are going to regret when you miss the timing.
But your problem is about conservative parents who fear what you do as a child right?
Islamic verses in Quran prohibit dating but that doesn't say boy s can't befriend with girls, even they are parents or scholars out there forbids this strictly. But if we use our common sense in this, how can we not talk to someone opposite gender in this world. Muslim females and males do and can talk to each other and get to know each other well. If this is not happening how in the world we are supposed to marry them in the first place. But sadly I guess my parents are in the group that doesn't agree with this statement.
As a muslim, love should step into marriage. Some muslims believe in arranged marriage, but guess what that is actually beyond Quran. The Quran itself says the people choose who to marry. The parent can have input but custom, but forcing someone to love and marry a particular person is islamically wrong.
I can totally understand the fear you have to tell your parents about the situation you're in. You might have strict parents as mine. Even nowadays it is so common in this world about being in a relationship. If your parents are easy going you're on the lucky side because they might permit you too see or talk to the boy but with advice and condition for sure. I'm happy for you if you have that kind of parents!! How I wish too haha.
You know how your parents are. If you are afraid of them, it is a shame. But you still want to be with that guy, you have no choice, you still have to tell them. It is worst if they find out by themself which it would surely going to make some scene. Consider yourself carefully and be sure that you actually love the boy with the intention of getting married. It is highly likely your parents will want this and to know the boy is a good kind hearted, wants to be a responsible to you.
But is is also possible for you to get punished, as often what I know from my culture, our parents are strict and hold old tradition views. Before telling your parents, maybe you should seek out help from an islamic society's view.
Control feelings?
Monday 4 March 2019 at 22:48
Assalamualaikum
Is it okay to fall in love? I wonder it too.
Feelings are not something that we can control, but we can control our actions :)
You will always have someone that you love, because it's your heart and your mind that choose a person based on their looks, action, words and behavior.
But relationship between boys and girls are not acceptable before marriage. Some might say who says dating isn't an option? But that isn't the rule of Allah. Of course it is impossible to not to talk with them, it is normal to talk because we all live together on this planet, but remember physical contact is to be avoided.
Talking to parents is important which I haven't do so because my parents are super duper strict. If you're in a really good open relationship with your parents talk to them first. We can also go out with them, but make sure get a group of friends together to go with you. It doesn't have to be one on one. Don't give yourselves the option of committing zina. If you have good intentions remain strong. There is no harm in falling in love.
But, we have to remember that we will meet a lot of people, we will have different feelings, we will experience a lot of relationships. My advice is, live your life normally but remember that you value a lot, not any one can hear your sweet words, not any one can see your attractive features, not any one can touch you, be precious.
It can only be that person you chose yourself, the one that will love you dearly, the one that is willing to do anything for you, the one you chose as your husband. It's a great deal. think about it carefully. And know more about your religion.
Relationship like this usually have a mysterious ending or it will never end. That is why we take marriage seriously. We pray and ask Allah if it was a good decision. We observe our partners and see if we will be good together.
Majlis Khatan Adik
Monday 25 February 2019 at 00:32
Assalamualaikum & hai,
Dalam family saya, kitorang akan sambut majlis khatan ni agak special sikit. Sampai kadang-kadang orang terkejut tengok cara kitorang sambut. Hahaha. Kitorang orang mamak (indian muslim) memang macam ni yee. So adik saya tiga tiga laki. Dua orang Khatan masa saya form 1 tak silap so cam tak ingat sangat. Tapi diorang pun ada pelamin, jemput 500 org makan and etc. But sekarang, adik bongsu saya yg teramat manja ni... MashaAllah.. Pening kepala seh. My dad terlalu manjakan dia so majlis pun dah ala ala majlis kahwin sudahh.
At first, kitorang (ayh, mak, pakcik, makcik, saudara mara, sepupu sepapat) semuanya dah meeting untuk kali pertama sebulan lebih awal untuk majlis ni. HAHAHA. Asalnya, bercadang nak jemput 200 org SAHAJA, then pak cik saya kat KL suruh jemput je semua puak puak kami dari Pulau pinang, Ipoh, Taiping, KL & etc. Saudara mara saya memang ramai. Infiniti orang. Siapa kenal saya taulah ramai tu level bape. Hahaha. So listnya jadilah 400 orang. Tak kisahlah, dapatlah kitorang eratkan lagi silaturahim dengan saudara mara kan (even sebenarnya tak tau nak panggil diorang apa, tak kenal tapi saudara, diorang pun tak kenal saya, saya pun tak kenal diorang).
Kitorang bincang atur cara majlis, ceh wahhh memang dah macam kerja kahwin.
2pm - Yasin, doa selamat & tazkirah.
3pm - Berarak bersama 120 adik adik tahfiz sambil berselawat
4pm- Makan makan sambil menghayati qasidah dari kumpulan Qasidah Nur Muhibbin, Ustaz Sharil
Adik sampai depan rumah je, ada kawan ayah buat silat selamat datang & bila adik masuk duduk atas pelamin je mula qasidah. Masa yang sama tetamu dah start makan. Bayangkanlah ayah jemput dekat 400 orang dan yang datang 800 orang. HAHAHA. HURU HARA WEYYY. Sebab pinggan makan ada 500 je. Then suddenly tak cukup, plastik sampah tak cukup, air pun sama. So lari pergi bukak kedai, nasib baik kedai dekat dengan rumah. Naib baik nasi cukup & ada lebih, syukur sangat sangat. Sebab adik adik tahfiz ramai sangat, kesian diorang kalau tak dapat. Yelah, kita jemput orang kan, kalau tak dapat bagi semua makan, malu kot.
Alhamdulillah settle semua. Majlis berjalan macam biasa. Sebelum adik mula berarak, ada tazkirah ringkas dari Ustaz Shariful Anam. Saya pun tak sempat dengar kat rumah, tapi ada orang ambik video. Best ceramah dia.
Yang palinggggg saya rasa sedih tu pasal makanan!! Makanan ada banyakkkk jenis & banyak sangat but sepanjang majlis tu saya tak dapat makan apa apa. Last last kitorang gi mcd je. Lols. Ada satee, rojak, roti jala, briyani, ayam masak merah, daging masak apa tak tahu (tak sempat tengok pun), ketupat, rendang, buah anggur, buah delima, kuih ada 4 jenis, brownies ada 2 jenis. Dalam list atas tu satu pun saya tak dapat. Hahahah sedih beb. Sebab asalnya saya siap tangguh tarikh nak cabut gigi sebab nak menikmati makanan makanan yang ada masa majlis. Hampeh.
Saudara mara ramai, kawan kawan pun ramai, Alhamdullilah, majlis berjalan lancar. Petang tu, kitorang sambut birthday anak saudara, Al Khattab turns 2!! Petang tu pun dah agak hura hara sikit, so tak sempat nak bergambar nak hias apa apa, even dah siap beli perhiasan nak hias tempat masa nak potong kek tu. Tak kesampaian, masa tu pulak ada keluarga kawan saya datang. Humairah sekeluarga datang. Lama sangat tak jumpe dia, sempat jugak lah catch up sikit dengan dia. Mak Syafiqa & Adawiyah ada datang, Alhamdulillah dapat layan dengan baik, siap berarak sama sama sambil selawat. Petang tu Ain & ayah dia pun ada datang, serious tak sempat nak layan dia. Rasa bersalah gila, bayangkan dia datang saya tak dapat layan sangat, tapi esoknya abang dia kawin, saya, & saudara saya semua pergi majlis kahwin abang dia lambat. Pergi pulak masa meja semua dah siap kemas. Sebab kat rumah saudara mara ramai belum balik, kene masak & layan tetamu. Tapi ayah Ain siap pasang balik meja & hidang makan untuk kitorang. Siap dapat kek pulak. Malu seh, yalah, diorang datang berdua je pun kita tak sempat layan. Ain..oh Ain. Sayang awak Ain.
Biasanya kan kalau majlis apa apa kat rumah yang girls, tolong dalam rumah kan? But masa majlis haritu, oleh sebab ayah dah jemput ramaiiii sangat orang, sampai saya pun terpaksa turun padang. Hahaha. Tanpa segan silu layan tetamu yang tak kenal pun, macamlah saya peramah sangat. Siap mengarah orang buat kerja lagi, amek kausss!! Malam before majlis, kitorang, saudara mara je, buat tahlil bacaan yasin untuk semua arwah arwah dalam family kitorang, list panjang, termasuk nama nenek moyang. Kitorang baca yasin pukul 12.30 tengah malam. Tak pernah dibuat orang. Hahahaha, kitorang masing-masing tutup kedai dulu. Lepas yasin kitorang makan sama sama tengah malam buta tu kat khemah luar rumah tu. Sweet memories.
Nak cerita pasal kos pulak, manalah tau ada yang nak buat majlis macam ni kan? Btw, lupa nak cakap masak semua dekat rumah, tak ambik catering pun, ayah yang masak. Jimat duit & besttt!!! Sebab dapat rewang sama sama.
Pelamin - RM580
Khemah - RM900
Qasidah - RM300
Sewa buffet - Ada orang sponsor
Ustaz - Seikhlas hati korang
Homestay - RM300 (Ada saudara stay)
Bas untuk adik adik tahfiz - RM200
Baju - RM500 ( Set baju melayu 4 orang, samping & tanjak)
Barang masak - ambik kat kedai sendiri, so tak kira kos ^^
Satee - RM910
Alaaa, memang list tak habis. Banyak keluar duit. Belum majlis kawin guys, baru majlis khatan. Sekali sekala tak pelah, bukannya ada pembaziran pun. Masa balik kan tetamu bagi duit masa salam kan, duit salam kaut. Ramai orang bagi dekat saya, sebab mak & ayah terlalu sibuk, kakak pulak sibuk kat dalam. Lepas 5 hari baru teringat pasal duit tu, hahaha. Nasib baik ingat.
Best tau buat majlis macam ni, meriah, dapat eratkan silaturahim, bila je dapat kumpul rqamai ramai macam ni. Penat tu memang penat. Lepas majlis, kitorang semua terus tak sihat, demam, muntah-muntah, cirit birit. Semua geng kitorang yang turun padang je. Yang dari Ipoh, KL. Kesian my sis & anak anak dia. Dahlah penat travel, lepastu baby dua dua tak sihat, dengan dia pun sama. Tak boleh lupa. Sama sama semua sakit. Ada yang kata kene buatan orang lah apalah. Sampai kitorang semua masuk rumah je macam tak sihat. Tapi Alhamdullilah, lepas 3 hari semua dah sihat. Takde bende rasenya, semua lepak buat kerja kot.
Korang boleh check kat link yang saya bagi ni, kalau nak tengok majlis yang saya cerita ni macam mana.
Qasidah - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HfCmyeTEbwA
Ceramah & Majlis - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50Kky7JDXrI
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| Korang boleh dengar ceramah dia kat link saya bagi kat atas. |
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| My cute brother |
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Lastly, Me & selfie. Haha XD
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Finally, saya update entry ni selepas sekian lama saya simpan sebagai draft. Bye, Assalmualaikum.
A lot of things happened recently
Wednesday 13 February 2019 at 21:49
Assalamualaikum & hi
I miss sharing everything here so much as recently my schedule are packed so i don't have enough time to share my story here.
But let me summaries it to share it to you guys & as my own memory too, i don't want to forget all the things happened tho, in future i can get my memories back here, i guess?
There are a lot of things i want to share, really don't know where to start. Should i start from the bad thing or good thing?
Past few weeks, my grandma's brother, which i call "appa" (grandpa) came to Malaysia, all the way from India, to settle down here. He had been thrown away by his daughter because of money issue. Then, he came to Malaysia as he thought he can stay at his sister's children house which is my mom's siblings at Pulau Pinang. But he didn't knew, everyone was struggling, everyone have their own problems going on, they can't even feed themselves enough, cause busy, no time & many more. My uncle lost his son (my cousin, same age) & still struggling tho, plus, he was busy with his daughter marriage. I don't know who i should pity, grandpa? Uncle? Aunt? My dad? Mom? Myself? Next, if he want to stay at my aunt's house (even she was welcoming) my aunt herself was struggling at maximum as she was not in good health condition. As my family, we had our issues going on at that moment to. As a conclusion i can say that no one did really volunteer to took care of him.
My father helped him to took care of his visa, found a work & place to stay. Even i knew my father really wanted to help him as he can, but i also knew that my grandpa is not in a good enough condition to work, he CAN'T work. He can't hear well, how can he work? Once he was a famous cook at his place but now..
After the wedding, he came to my place, he wanted to stay with us for a while. He really loves us. The day he came, my parents went to Penang. The next day he shared all his problem with me & my mother. He told us he was mentally hurt. He talked non stop about his worries. But i think he only shared 20% of his worries. He don't want us to feel bad for him. The next day he kept on asking me for a drive, he said he really wanted to go for a ride with me. But i was busy at that time. I regret. I promised him i will take him for a ride tomorrow. Now i remember few months ago he called me from India & asked me if i have a licence so that when he come to Malaysia i can take him out
Wednesday, at around 8pm my sister called me and asked me to come asap to my father shop. I was shocked as i can hear crying sound at the background. I really can't forgot how i was driving back then, i was shivering, i was scared. I managed to go tho.
My sister told me, my grandpa involved in an accident, a super bike hit him. He was walking back from mosque after magrib prayer. It was just in front of my father's shop, and my brothers all was there, when the accident happened. They were shocked. The bike was super speed so when the accident happened both of them....
The night after the accident, we went to hospital, he was still in the yellow zone. Is it because he was old? He was in a yellow zone even he was so critical. And the super bike guy was in red zone. Even he was not that critical. My grandpa's both arm & leg & eyes & nose and his head was seriously injured.
The next day he was sent to XXX Hospital & all the things they cared about was only money. Only because he was a foreigner so the cost is higher there and the doc was only talking about the cost not how's my grandpa condition. They (doctors) didn't want to touch his head, they wanted us to pay for minor things like leg, arm, nose & eyes. Because they knew if they touch my grandpa head, he can't survive. He is 73 yo. He was really at his maximum & all they cared about was money. The total cost their were talking was about 40 to 50k.
At thursday, 1.55pm he was gone. He can't take it anymore. But he was smiling at the moment. His smile was the sweetest smile ever. We can't even cry when we saw his smiling face. It was hard to believe at the first. But he was called by Allah on the way his was walking back from prayers. MashaAllah.
I really can't go in detail about this. Bye, Assalamualaikum.
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ONE AND TWO
Tuesday 1 September 2020 at 22:16
The only ONE mistake i made in my life, Sacrificed my future for my parents. And this ONE mistake, this ONE step is making my life messier and harder day by day. Regret? Yes, very much. I didn’t feel like this before but nowadays things have been going upside down. I can’t control my feelings. But it’s okay!! I got this!! Everything happens for a reason, ALLAH is with me.
TWO Left something I shouldn’t, Because of my parents too, I don’t want to betray them, I made promise so I should keep it, Parents can control us in everything I guess, But when it comes to feeling, it’s quite hard, It have been a year but I can still get teary eyes when I think about it, But the memories makes me laugh so hard sometimes, But still cried a river for it. It have been a year and my heart still aches whenever I think about it. But I’m thankful tho, i guess ALLAH protected me.
A song that I can totally relate
at 21:22
Assalamualaikum To My Youth by Bol4 At some point, I used to wish I would disappear from this world,
The whole world seemed so dark and I cried every night,
Will I feel better if I just disappeared?I was so afraid of everyone's eyes on me.
During this beautifully beautiful days, I was in pain, I hated myself for not being able to receive love, My mom and dad, they're looking at me, It's not how i really feel but i keep getting farther away.
What do I do?
The saying time is medicine was really true for me, As the days went by, I really got better, But sometimes, when I'm too happy, I'm afraid I'll be in pain again, I'm afraid that someone will take away this happiness.
Those beautifully beautiful memories were so painful, I was hurting and hurting but the pain wouldn't go away, My friends, all these people, they're only looking at me, This isn't how I really am but I keep getting farther away.
But still, maybe I can be, A bright light in this world, Maybe after all of the pain, I can shortly shine a light, So I couldn't give up, I couldn't fall asleep peacefully for a single night, Because maybe if I keep trying to get up like this, I will find myself.
I could never explain how this song really meant to me, every time i felt so down, I would listen so this song, and i couldn't control my tears from falling. It means a lot to me.
Life
at 19:40
Assalamualaikum Well, life is full of surprises and not always it would come in a good way! Sometimes we might be lucky as the surprise would make us happy but sometimes yeah we just have to accept something that we would never want to happen in our life. Let me tell a story. I struggled with myself for a long time moving on to accept the fact I would be only getting married to the person my parents chose not my choice. I am not able to motivate myself for marriage because of that. I knew something is really off with this marriage thing I can't find a reason to accept the fact I should fall in love with a random person they ask me to marry. Every single time any guy's family asks for me I'll ask my parents to cut it off, I would not listen to them anything about the guy. I couldn't explain why, but something doesn't feel right for me. I knew that I should accept the fact I have to get married even I'm saying no for now but idk how to explain this feeling. I feel like arrange marriage is like putting my life on the toss, heads I win, tail I lose, what if I get the bad guy? What if that is not the life I want. I can't just run away after right? I want to get married to a person that I know his bad and good behavior. Arrange marriage is just to risky. I always do think getting married to someone we don't know is tough. But whenever I look at my parents, I feel opposite, they're are one of the best couple I could have ever seen in my life. It have been more than 20 years and they're still madly in love with each other. They're sweet, loving, they do fight but they would be fine after few minutes. My mom is really understanding, she is the best, even when my dad is not in the mood, stressed out, she would be always be by his side. They had arranged marriage too. They had been together in all the sorrows and happiness, they're the best example I have and be the only reason I still accepting the fact I would have an arranged marriage. I'll update here if I did able to go through an arranged marriage!
Hati
Friday 8 November 2019 at 22:38
Assalamualaikum
Kadang kala,
Sekeras batu,
Kadang kala,
Selembut kapas. Ya Allah, lembutkanlah hatiku.
A not so love story
at 22:14
Assalamualaikum,
Storytime :)
A unromantic not so love story between two college students. It began when this girl was a new student, everything was strange to her, she was quiet and shy to talk to others, she was so lonely and had no idea what was going on as they are students who just finished high school, everything was new to them, the college system and stuff. But, this one guy helped her to get comfortable from the day one, he helped her in everything, he arranged everything for her. Both of them become best friends since that day.
Little did she know, the guy was already have feelings for her, the guy started to become clingy, sweet, protective towards her. Days to months, both of them became inseparable, they studied & scored top together, attended a lot of programs together, countless time doing assignments, projects and stuffs like that together. All was just okay until the guy planned to confess her with a bouquet of flowers. The super confused girl, who had zero love feelings towards him started to feel super guilty and uncomfortable around him.
Later on, she avoided that guy badly, ignored his messages and calls for a week. Then, the guy managed to meet her up and slow talked to her & said it’s okay to reject him, we can be just friends, he was cool about it and all. After that incident, he acted like nothing happened which make this girl started to feel confused about her feeling because she can’t stop thinking about him. He was on her mind 24/7.
To add, this guy was okay with the rejection but he didn’t give up on her as he continued to being a super sweet boy bestfriend to her. Too many sweet little surprise with sweet poems and flowers and foods and his gentle behaviour started to make her heart melt. The girl wanted to be with this guy, as she couldn’t meet someone better than him ever after. But she can’t really be in a relationship. It’s forbidden for her to do so. She talked to the guy abt her situation and guess what this gentleman understood everything abt her and was willing to be okay with it.
Which means they stayed just friends until both of them are in their 20s, finished studies and ready to be in a relationship openly, without hiding to both of their families. Months to years, everything was just going good. Both of them finished college, they have to go back home, no more staying at dorms, no more time together. The guy gifted a really nice shoe to the girl with a cute lil card saying see you soon!! Good luck to our future. But little he did know, that was the last time ever he could see her.
She died.
The end
Acted mature
Friday 27 September 2019 at 23:52
I just acted mature, that's all.
I had to react that way to unburden you.
That way, you'd feel less guilty.
But do you know that?
To tell the truth, i didn't want to be like this.
No tittle
at 03:46
Reminder for myself, Jika sesuatu itu baik untukmu, maka Allah akan mendekatkannya dengan kamu.
tetapi jika itu tidak baik untukmu, maka Allah akan menjauhkannya darimu.
Online shopping
Tuesday 24 September 2019 at 01:06
Assalamualaikum
I'm becoming an online shopping monster, I'm seriously wasting a lot of money nowadays. I can see that, whenever I find a break time, I'm scrolling through an online shopping platform and adding stuff to my cart, It became a habit, a very bad one. Until I realized I hardly save money nowadays as my future saving as I did since I was 7.
I have strictly warned myself to bring down my bad habits. Since that, I tried to find solution for this. The few things I found I can do with the money I have so I don't waste it on online shopping is, first of all I deleted some apps I often buy clothes and bags, as I already have enough of that things for now. Next is, I list the things I want badly and only buy it want I really really want it, not because I was bored. I also do add to cart and just wait, lol. I wait for discount or sale so I can save money. Yup, I'm trying really hard. I also did create another saving account in my bank account, so I save money in the form of fixed deposit monthly. I'm also learning about buying digital gold on online platform. You tube really do teach us so many things we don't learn in school. I have a lot of interest in buying gold as our saving and investment. But, I still have to learn and got to know about it fully before I start an gold investment, to make sure I don't lose anything and earn profit somehow.
Hopefully, this all helps me overcome my online shopping addiction.
Chocolate chips cookies ala subway
at 01:03
Assalamualaikum & hi
Every time nampak subway je mesti singgah beli cookies dia. Memang super sedap & family saya semua suka cookies dia.
So at first saya tried to buat resepi sendiri & hasilnya kurang memuaskan, kalau baling cookies tu kepala orang boleh pecah. Keras nak mati. Patahlah gigi kalau makan cookies tu. Then, 2nd try saya adjust resepi dari YouTube, It's from an Indonesian lady, Kueh kering chip cookies. Oleh sebab dah tengok terlalu banyak resepi saya sendiri dah confius ni resepi dari siapa, tak ingat, tengok history pun pening.
All the things you need :
90g gula kastor
155g gula perang
1 sk garam
115g buttercup
155g tepung gandum
1/2 sk baking powder
1 biji telur
1 sk esen vanila
chocolate chip
Procedure :
- Campak campak je, yang penting chocolate chip tu masuk last & the dough tu need to be chilled 30min baru senang sikit nak buat bentuk bulat.
- Preheat 180 dc & bakar 12min
Tips : Add brown sugar to make it chewier
Resepi : Kek gula hangus paling simple & senang
Friday 13 September 2019 at 23:37
Assalamualaikum,
My Atta's fav, so i tried, guna resepi Seminit di Youtube, now it became my Amma's fav too :)
Bahan-bahan:
1 cawan tepung gandum ( diayak )
1 cawan susu cair
1 sudu kecik soda bikarbonat ( diayak )
4 biji telur
125 gram butter cup
1 1/2 cawan gula
Cara-caranya :
1. Pukul 4 biji telur, masukkan 1 cawan susu cair.
2. Masukkan 1 cawan tepung gandum, 1 sk soda bikarbonat.
3. Pukul sampai sebati.
Gula hangus :
1. Masukkan 1 1/2 cawan gula pasir, api perlahan.
2. Kacau supaya gula tak melekat dekat kuali.
3. Lepas gula cair, masukkan 1 cawan air yang mendidih.
4. Kacau, kacau, kacau, masukkan 125g buttercup.
5. Masukkan dalam adunan tepung tadi.
Dah campur dua dua tu tadi, kacau sampai sebati, kukus selama 1 jam.
Tips:
Nak kek gula hangus ni menjadi dia punya sarang semut dia, tuang gula hangus tu masa panas2 dalam adunan, tak payah perap, memang 100% jadi. InshaAllah.
A poem
at 23:12
Assalamualaikum
I saw a poem in Facebook today, and I fell in love.
If your sins are the size of mountain, Always remember HIS rahma is like, The water that creates those humble canyons,
Do not despair, He is the forgiving, The ever pardoning,
If your pain is deeper than t he rifts beneath the surface of the earth Always remember after every hardship There is ease, Do not despair,
Positive
at 23:08
Assalamualaikum
Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world.
Today, I'm wise so I'm changing myself
<3
Remember
Monday 9 September 2019 at 23:46
Assalamualaikum
I need to always remember this on thing, key to be a better person, day by day, nothing is more important than, a person who is willing to admit that, we are not always right, and I'm willing to do that, I'm not always right.
Patient
at 23:45
Assalamualaikum
The greatest lesson you can teach yourself is to be patient. Be patient when you're happy because happiness ends, and be patient when you're sad because sadness too ends. Nothing is constant. Everything is temporary, expect Allah, The only Everlasting.
Rindu
at 08:14
They say there is a reason They say time will heal Neither time or reason Will change the way I feel Gone are the days But in my heart You are always there The gates of memories Will never close I miss you more than anybody know.
Al fatihah to my beloved appa cantik Sesungguhnya rindu yang paling sakit adalah rindu pada orang yang dah meninggal dunia,
No tittle
at 00:40
Assalamualaikum
Rahsia orang, aku bakal bawak sampai mati -
Rahsia yang buat aku tak tenteram,
Tidur aku tak lena.
Hati aku sakit bagai tertusuk duri.
Terluka, pedih, kecewa.
Semua ada!
Jika aku cerita pada orang lain,
Walau ianya demi aku,
Kerana aku bagaikan depresi,
Bukan untukku buka aib dia,
Hidup bagai tidak bermakna bila ku tahu,
Rahsia dia, buatku binasa bersama.
Apakan daya, terpaksaku simpan rahsia ini kekubur :)
Untung kita, Allah tutup aib kita didunia.
Sweet sour
at 00:02
Assalamualaikum
You are a story, A little paragraph story that came to my life, A story I would tell my future children, How it felt like, Sweet and sour, Bitter and twisted.
My siblings
Wednesday 14 August 2019 at 19:35
Assalamualaikum
Bende yg saya nak sangat in future is good relationship with my beloved siblings. Saya nak kami semua sama macam sekarang, saling menyayangi antara satu sama lain. Even kitorang ada gaduh, itu kira bende biasalah, gaduh gaduh manja je. Harini gaduh, esok berbaik :) So, i want this forever. Bukan dengan adik beradik kandung je, dengan adik beradik saudara pun nak stay macam sekarang. Because our relationship is too precious, i appreciate every single moment in my life i spent with them.
I can say that I have an extremely good relationship with my siblings. I'm 20 year old female and have a sister 2 years older than me and 3 more brothers with a huge gap of years with me. I have close relationship with all of them but I'm closest to my small little brother, of course. Everyday after his school he comes into my room to just talk to me about his and my day. He is so kind and very mature for his age. We both have the same perspective on life so that's why I believe we are so close. He always says the nicest thing to me, kind hearted too. I love my other two brothers too, but nowadays I can feel that there are some gap between us. It's a little complicated. When they were little kids they used to follow my lead, but the older they got, they developed their own idea, the farther apart we got. I understand. Even we don't see eyes to eyes in many topic but there are few things that bring us together. We share a completely opposite brothers sisters relationship. We typically fight on everything but when time comes we stand together. My relationship my sister is pretty good, she is a very quite type, she is in her own world always, sometimes I feel like she is my little sister for me. I should have born first. We are like friends gossip and do shopping together. We rarely fight.
We aren't perfect and we love each other's imperfections because that is the one of the prime reasons why you need your siblings. I do something wrong, they scold me, I get angry, I realize my mistake. I approach them and say sorry, hugs and so on and also same goes to them. It is very common between us.
A relationship no matter how much we fight among ourselves but ones someone come against one of us, we are united. I really hope we stay as now forever after even after all of us got married, have our own family, our relationship should stay as good as now.
A relationship where we plan to trouble our mom together. A relationship where we embarrass each other intentionally. A lot more that I could not ever put it into words.
No one is perfect but I'm okay to ignore all the other faults because they're my blood.
Sin
Sunday 4 August 2019 at 00:19
Assalamualaikum,
We all sin,Every single one of us do sin, Nobody is perfect, We are trying to, We do mistake, We repent, Stop thinking you're above everyone else, Don't treat others like they are insignificant, A person who is down today can climb up tomorrow, Only the Almighty knows what the future holds.
I'm addicted
Saturday 3 August 2019 at 23:53
Assalamualaikum
My very first k-drama is You're Beautiful, I started watching it when I was very young, I was just 13 at that time. I had a great experience of watching it. That drama made me fall in love with Korean drama. Especially oppa, there are a lot of handsome man in Korea!! It was the main reason why I became addicted to k-drama.
Thereafter, I started watching every Korean drama that I came across and within a time period of 2 days I can complete a full completed 24 episodes of a drama. How crazy! I wouldn't eat or either sleep, I'll just focus on the drama. I didn't realize that I wasted a lot of my precious time of mine watching dramas though they were very entertaining that wasn't proper time to watch them all. I felt like I find my happiness in other world of drama that doesn't even exist, where I and my favorite character only present in that particular world, letting it take my mind and heart. At that moment, I realized that k-drama became my addiction. So I decided to overcome it by slowly. It was not easy, it may seem easy to do so but it to be honest it was really hard. Those time when I felt I should marathon whole drama, I convinced my mind not to do so. Instead I watch it with limit, 1 episode per day. Now, I still do watch k-drama but in control. It's not like you need to stop everything you like to save time, instead you should do it in a controlled way.
I'll just have fun watching handsome oppa and pretty unnies!! because my life is kind of boring and stress at the same time at least k-drama do give a little spark in my life.
Disappointed
at 23:47
Assalamualaikum,
So today,
Just after a few heartbreak without gap,
I'm disappointed again.
Wow, what a month!
Full of surprises,
That i didn't even ask.
July 2019 will be remembered as the worst month ever,
Heartbreak over heartbreak,
There were nothing special in this month,
There were no good news at all.
I'm tired,
Mentally & physically,
Crying,
Again & again.
It is no such things that i have no one to share,
I have a good listener,
But i want to keep it with me, forever.
Yesterday i was shocked because of my "friend's" problem,
But it had already happened,
So i can't do anything.
Urm, and today I'm still in shock because of someone,
But much more to disappointment, i was only shocked for a few moment, and yeaa~
Sad.
My chest had a really weird feeling, i was really in pain,
No words to describe,
But i tried my best to solve it & hoping for the best,
And i still believe the "someone", no matter what he do, i will correct it, for his/her better future.
I love you now & forever
Healing
Wednesday 24 July 2019 at 19:46
Assalamualaikum
How I mend a heart broken heart, Pain, It's getting harder to hide, It's even harder to explain, It's never easy, I have to be strong and forge ahead, Put a smile on my face as I walk out the door,
I cry all the time now, I used to think I was strong, Now It's a struggle just to hold on, To make it through the day, Without someone asking if I'm okay.
I just need a plenty of time. As others have done before, Then I'll be able to start my normal life again, As happy as before.
Another Problem
Wednesday 17 July 2019 at 21:33
Assalamualaikum
When someone you trust betray you,
The feeling of betrayal,
It really hurt you know,
Don't trust people so easily,
Even it's your patner, siblings, relatives, friends.
I'm Just sayin,
I trust them tho,
That's the problem,
I hope nobody breaks my trust,
I just don't wanna be in pain.
To those who seek to change,
Please change with full of your heart,
Don't be like somebody i know,
"The somebody" pretended to change,
Then, we believe in things we see,
Then, betrayal, again and again.
Leaving scar....
Betrayal
Sunday 14 July 2019 at 19:39
Assalamualaikum
Yesterday night,
For the first time in my life,
I feel depressed,
I was in shock,
My hands were shakin,
Even it was not my fault,
I felt like everything was my fault.
Each betrayal begins with trust,
I trusted you, No, we trusted you,
You were like-
No,
Now i know, betrayal never comes from your enemies,
It's from people around you,
People that you trust,
Now, i have trust issues, thanks to you.
Moments by Christopher
Tuesday 25 June 2019 at 02:22
Assalamualaikum
A song that I have been listening on repeat nowadays, the lyrics just tackkk chua!!
Please don't say a word, cause they all have been said now, Like a journey coming to the end, You say, Let it run like the river, wild and without a care, Just like the days we were young and fumbling.
Everything fades away, let it go by the flow, Really wish i could stay, but you know me, All the moments we shared are not going anywhere, Never quite understood it when you told me, Just close your eyes and I be right by your side, Cause memories don't say goodbye.
Everything happens for a reason
Thursday 13 June 2019 at 20:41
There is a couple things a want to say,
Don't worry dear, don't worry,
Everything happens for a reason,
Don't you take it as a bad thing,
No, never.
As i said, everything happens for a reason,
And it is for a good reason,
It is because we pray to ALLAH,
To help us,
We pray to protect us from dangerous things,
We pray to a better future,
We pray for a beautiful life,
We pray for our health,
We pray for everyone & everything,
So here it is,
ALLAH is making it all happen,
All the beautiful things we asked for.
So sister,
Life can be hard sometimes,
But everything happens for a reason,
Don't ever surrender ❤
APPA CANTIK
at 19:26
Appa cantik,
That's how i call my grandpa.
11th of Jun 2019, 7th day of Eidulfitri,
We are all teary,
We lost him already,
A phone call that made us all go crazy,
He left us in his sleep peacefully.
A lot of beautiful memories,
Will be cherished,
Deep inside me,
A lot of good things,
Are all from him.
He starts his day with prayes & Quran,
His mouth never gets tired praising ALLAH,
All the good things he did,
Can never be listed.
All the nabi's story he told me,
Made me teary today.
Alfatihah to my appa cantik Haji Abdul Latheef bin Syed Ibrahim Shah.
Let it go
Monday 20 May 2019 at 01:42
Assalamualaikum
How to let go someone out of our mind and heart. I'm so confused seeked for help from online society, many gave me a lot of different ideas and advice which I would like to share here.
As you are in crush on someone and can't get it out of you system? They said time. That's it. Only time can help you. There is no on or off switch, time is the one and only option. It will fade away soon.
I don't know how long it going to take for you as for me, I haven't really moved on.
However, if a lot time passes and you are still feeling it, then you have a to look it back carefully.
Feelings are only less of what it make works. The rest depends on how well each other person deal with their own feelings and emotion. It is also mainly about the level of emotional maturity.
How do you move on? Understand that your feelings for them has become a habit, an addiction, in fact now you feel the withdrawal symptom. We want to do anything we could to end them and may feel so desperate about it.
Instead try to stay busy, but we have to feel relaxed, listen to some of your fav movie. Yes the more relaxed we are, the less we hurt, whether it is emotional or physical.
Understand that they are your habit and that cannot stop thoughts from rising up. You can control whether or not you dwell on them. When you start think about them, you say firmly I do that anymore and turn your attention somewhere else. You must create a new habit so you won't think about them.
As for feelings, the more we think someone else will permanently make us happy, the more miserable we are going to be. So even it feels impossible to tear them out, the key is distancing yourself from that person slowly. Suddenly cutting them off will only hurt you more or hurt the other person. Text them once in a while don't completely ghost them up. Try to have girls days out. Over time the feelings will fade away more and more before you know it, you are over them! Again it won't happen overnight, but you will be there. Hang in there thight!
I think actually I'm not qualified enough to share this here because i haven't really succeeded in this, hopefully soon.
RAYA 2019
Friday 17 May 2019 at 01:12
Assalamualaikum & hi
Today is officially 12 ramadhan which means we all can already feel the Raya vibes. It's quite a bit earlier right?
I don't know lah if you guys haven't feel the raya vibes yet (because maybe you're a student with exam stress and all). But for me, as I'm in a business industry, i guess? I totally in it! Raya!! We already got a lot of hampers & kuih raya from the companies & also my father's shop started selling variety types of kuih raya today (and there is a lot guys, i want to eat it alllll)
So, when because we are already in the raya vibes, i decided to make a lot of kuih raya this year. But i don't know if i will have enough time or not becase this year I'm hella busy with 2 shops. Plus, i want to khatam al Quran really soon. I have a lot of work but still i want to make kuih raya on my own. Baru betul betul raya kan? 😂 For me, I think Raya is not complete without homemade kuih raya!!! Here is my list of kuih raya i will be doing this year, later i will update whether i did manage to do it all or nah? And also i want to save my recepi here.
1. Butter cookies
2. Almond london
3. Semperit dahlia
4. Semperit
5. Cornfalkes
Being in love as a Muslim
Friday 10 May 2019 at 01:41
Assalamualaikum
Love feelings with the intention of marrying them and love without the intention of marrying is two different thing, totally. In my opinion, it is all about how you handle it, I'm saying this again firstly when we found someone we should make sure he or she is the one and with the intention of marrying them in mind we should consult our parents before it is too late. You are going to regret when you miss the timing.
But your problem is about conservative parents who fear what you do as a child right?
Islamic verses in Quran prohibit dating but that doesn't say boy s can't befriend with girls, even they are parents or scholars out there forbids this strictly. But if we use our common sense in this, how can we not talk to someone opposite gender in this world. Muslim females and males do and can talk to each other and get to know each other well. If this is not happening how in the world we are supposed to marry them in the first place. But sadly I guess my parents are in the group that doesn't agree with this statement.
As a muslim, love should step into marriage. Some muslims believe in arranged marriage, but guess what that is actually beyond Quran. The Quran itself says the people choose who to marry. The parent can have input but custom, but forcing someone to love and marry a particular person is islamically wrong.
I can totally understand the fear you have to tell your parents about the situation you're in. You might have strict parents as mine. Even nowadays it is so common in this world about being in a relationship. If your parents are easy going you're on the lucky side because they might permit you too see or talk to the boy but with advice and condition for sure. I'm happy for you if you have that kind of parents!! How I wish too haha.
You know how your parents are. If you are afraid of them, it is a shame. But you still want to be with that guy, you have no choice, you still have to tell them. It is worst if they find out by themself which it would surely going to make some scene. Consider yourself carefully and be sure that you actually love the boy with the intention of getting married. It is highly likely your parents will want this and to know the boy is a good kind hearted, wants to be a responsible to you.
But is is also possible for you to get punished, as often what I know from my culture, our parents are strict and hold old tradition views. Before telling your parents, maybe you should seek out help from an islamic society's view.
Control feelings?
Monday 4 March 2019 at 22:48
Assalamualaikum
Is it okay to fall in love? I wonder it too.
Feelings are not something that we can control, but we can control our actions :)
You will always have someone that you love, because it's your heart and your mind that choose a person based on their looks, action, words and behavior.
But relationship between boys and girls are not acceptable before marriage. Some might say who says dating isn't an option? But that isn't the rule of Allah. Of course it is impossible to not to talk with them, it is normal to talk because we all live together on this planet, but remember physical contact is to be avoided.
Talking to parents is important which I haven't do so because my parents are super duper strict. If you're in a really good open relationship with your parents talk to them first. We can also go out with them, but make sure get a group of friends together to go with you. It doesn't have to be one on one. Don't give yourselves the option of committing zina. If you have good intentions remain strong. There is no harm in falling in love.
But, we have to remember that we will meet a lot of people, we will have different feelings, we will experience a lot of relationships. My advice is, live your life normally but remember that you value a lot, not any one can hear your sweet words, not any one can see your attractive features, not any one can touch you, be precious.
It can only be that person you chose yourself, the one that will love you dearly, the one that is willing to do anything for you, the one you chose as your husband. It's a great deal. think about it carefully. And know more about your religion.
Relationship like this usually have a mysterious ending or it will never end. That is why we take marriage seriously. We pray and ask Allah if it was a good decision. We observe our partners and see if we will be good together.
Majlis Khatan Adik
Monday 25 February 2019 at 00:32
Assalamualaikum & hai,
Dalam family saya, kitorang akan sambut majlis khatan ni agak special sikit. Sampai kadang-kadang orang terkejut tengok cara kitorang sambut. Hahaha. Kitorang orang mamak (indian muslim) memang macam ni yee. So adik saya tiga tiga laki. Dua orang Khatan masa saya form 1 tak silap so cam tak ingat sangat. Tapi diorang pun ada pelamin, jemput 500 org makan and etc. But sekarang, adik bongsu saya yg teramat manja ni... MashaAllah.. Pening kepala seh. My dad terlalu manjakan dia so majlis pun dah ala ala majlis kahwin sudahh.
At first, kitorang (ayh, mak, pakcik, makcik, saudara mara, sepupu sepapat) semuanya dah meeting untuk kali pertama sebulan lebih awal untuk majlis ni. HAHAHA. Asalnya, bercadang nak jemput 200 org SAHAJA, then pak cik saya kat KL suruh jemput je semua puak puak kami dari Pulau pinang, Ipoh, Taiping, KL & etc. Saudara mara saya memang ramai. Infiniti orang. Siapa kenal saya taulah ramai tu level bape. Hahaha. So listnya jadilah 400 orang. Tak kisahlah, dapatlah kitorang eratkan lagi silaturahim dengan saudara mara kan (even sebenarnya tak tau nak panggil diorang apa, tak kenal tapi saudara, diorang pun tak kenal saya, saya pun tak kenal diorang).
Kitorang bincang atur cara majlis, ceh wahhh memang dah macam kerja kahwin.
2pm - Yasin, doa selamat & tazkirah.
3pm - Berarak bersama 120 adik adik tahfiz sambil berselawat
4pm- Makan makan sambil menghayati qasidah dari kumpulan Qasidah Nur Muhibbin, Ustaz Sharil
Adik sampai depan rumah je, ada kawan ayah buat silat selamat datang & bila adik masuk duduk atas pelamin je mula qasidah. Masa yang sama tetamu dah start makan. Bayangkanlah ayah jemput dekat 400 orang dan yang datang 800 orang. HAHAHA. HURU HARA WEYYY. Sebab pinggan makan ada 500 je. Then suddenly tak cukup, plastik sampah tak cukup, air pun sama. So lari pergi bukak kedai, nasib baik kedai dekat dengan rumah. Naib baik nasi cukup & ada lebih, syukur sangat sangat. Sebab adik adik tahfiz ramai sangat, kesian diorang kalau tak dapat. Yelah, kita jemput orang kan, kalau tak dapat bagi semua makan, malu kot.
Alhamdulillah settle semua. Majlis berjalan macam biasa. Sebelum adik mula berarak, ada tazkirah ringkas dari Ustaz Shariful Anam. Saya pun tak sempat dengar kat rumah, tapi ada orang ambik video. Best ceramah dia.
Yang palinggggg saya rasa sedih tu pasal makanan!! Makanan ada banyakkkk jenis & banyak sangat but sepanjang majlis tu saya tak dapat makan apa apa. Last last kitorang gi mcd je. Lols. Ada satee, rojak, roti jala, briyani, ayam masak merah, daging masak apa tak tahu (tak sempat tengok pun), ketupat, rendang, buah anggur, buah delima, kuih ada 4 jenis, brownies ada 2 jenis. Dalam list atas tu satu pun saya tak dapat. Hahahah sedih beb. Sebab asalnya saya siap tangguh tarikh nak cabut gigi sebab nak menikmati makanan makanan yang ada masa majlis. Hampeh.
Saudara mara ramai, kawan kawan pun ramai, Alhamdullilah, majlis berjalan lancar. Petang tu, kitorang sambut birthday anak saudara, Al Khattab turns 2!! Petang tu pun dah agak hura hara sikit, so tak sempat nak bergambar nak hias apa apa, even dah siap beli perhiasan nak hias tempat masa nak potong kek tu. Tak kesampaian, masa tu pulak ada keluarga kawan saya datang. Humairah sekeluarga datang. Lama sangat tak jumpe dia, sempat jugak lah catch up sikit dengan dia. Mak Syafiqa & Adawiyah ada datang, Alhamdulillah dapat layan dengan baik, siap berarak sama sama sambil selawat. Petang tu Ain & ayah dia pun ada datang, serious tak sempat nak layan dia. Rasa bersalah gila, bayangkan dia datang saya tak dapat layan sangat, tapi esoknya abang dia kawin, saya, & saudara saya semua pergi majlis kahwin abang dia lambat. Pergi pulak masa meja semua dah siap kemas. Sebab kat rumah saudara mara ramai belum balik, kene masak & layan tetamu. Tapi ayah Ain siap pasang balik meja & hidang makan untuk kitorang. Siap dapat kek pulak. Malu seh, yalah, diorang datang berdua je pun kita tak sempat layan. Ain..oh Ain. Sayang awak Ain.
Biasanya kan kalau majlis apa apa kat rumah yang girls, tolong dalam rumah kan? But masa majlis haritu, oleh sebab ayah dah jemput ramaiiii sangat orang, sampai saya pun terpaksa turun padang. Hahaha. Tanpa segan silu layan tetamu yang tak kenal pun, macamlah saya peramah sangat. Siap mengarah orang buat kerja lagi, amek kausss!! Malam before majlis, kitorang, saudara mara je, buat tahlil bacaan yasin untuk semua arwah arwah dalam family kitorang, list panjang, termasuk nama nenek moyang. Kitorang baca yasin pukul 12.30 tengah malam. Tak pernah dibuat orang. Hahahaha, kitorang masing-masing tutup kedai dulu. Lepas yasin kitorang makan sama sama tengah malam buta tu kat khemah luar rumah tu. Sweet memories.
Nak cerita pasal kos pulak, manalah tau ada yang nak buat majlis macam ni kan? Btw, lupa nak cakap masak semua dekat rumah, tak ambik catering pun, ayah yang masak. Jimat duit & besttt!!! Sebab dapat rewang sama sama.
Pelamin - RM580
Khemah - RM900
Qasidah - RM300
Sewa buffet - Ada orang sponsor
Ustaz - Seikhlas hati korang
Homestay - RM300 (Ada saudara stay)
Bas untuk adik adik tahfiz - RM200
Baju - RM500 ( Set baju melayu 4 orang, samping & tanjak)
Barang masak - ambik kat kedai sendiri, so tak kira kos ^^
Satee - RM910
Alaaa, memang list tak habis. Banyak keluar duit. Belum majlis kawin guys, baru majlis khatan. Sekali sekala tak pelah, bukannya ada pembaziran pun. Masa balik kan tetamu bagi duit masa salam kan, duit salam kaut. Ramai orang bagi dekat saya, sebab mak & ayah terlalu sibuk, kakak pulak sibuk kat dalam. Lepas 5 hari baru teringat pasal duit tu, hahaha. Nasib baik ingat.
Best tau buat majlis macam ni, meriah, dapat eratkan silaturahim, bila je dapat kumpul rqamai ramai macam ni. Penat tu memang penat. Lepas majlis, kitorang semua terus tak sihat, demam, muntah-muntah, cirit birit. Semua geng kitorang yang turun padang je. Yang dari Ipoh, KL. Kesian my sis & anak anak dia. Dahlah penat travel, lepastu baby dua dua tak sihat, dengan dia pun sama. Tak boleh lupa. Sama sama semua sakit. Ada yang kata kene buatan orang lah apalah. Sampai kitorang semua masuk rumah je macam tak sihat. Tapi Alhamdullilah, lepas 3 hari semua dah sihat. Takde bende rasenya, semua lepak buat kerja kot.
Korang boleh check kat link yang saya bagi ni, kalau nak tengok majlis yang saya cerita ni macam mana.
Qasidah - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HfCmyeTEbwA
Ceramah & Majlis - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50Kky7JDXrI
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| Korang boleh dengar ceramah dia kat link saya bagi kat atas. |
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| My cute brother |
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Lastly, Me & selfie. Haha XD
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Finally, saya update entry ni selepas sekian lama saya simpan sebagai draft. Bye, Assalmualaikum.
A lot of things happened recently
Wednesday 13 February 2019 at 21:49
Assalamualaikum & hi
I miss sharing everything here so much as recently my schedule are packed so i don't have enough time to share my story here.
But let me summaries it to share it to you guys & as my own memory too, i don't want to forget all the things happened tho, in future i can get my memories back here, i guess?
There are a lot of things i want to share, really don't know where to start. Should i start from the bad thing or good thing?
Past few weeks, my grandma's brother, which i call "appa" (grandpa) came to Malaysia, all the way from India, to settle down here. He had been thrown away by his daughter because of money issue. Then, he came to Malaysia as he thought he can stay at his sister's children house which is my mom's siblings at Pulau Pinang. But he didn't knew, everyone was struggling, everyone have their own problems going on, they can't even feed themselves enough, cause busy, no time & many more. My uncle lost his son (my cousin, same age) & still struggling tho, plus, he was busy with his daughter marriage. I don't know who i should pity, grandpa? Uncle? Aunt? My dad? Mom? Myself? Next, if he want to stay at my aunt's house (even she was welcoming) my aunt herself was struggling at maximum as she was not in good health condition. As my family, we had our issues going on at that moment to. As a conclusion i can say that no one did really volunteer to took care of him.
My father helped him to took care of his visa, found a work & place to stay. Even i knew my father really wanted to help him as he can, but i also knew that my grandpa is not in a good enough condition to work, he CAN'T work. He can't hear well, how can he work? Once he was a famous cook at his place but now..
After the wedding, he came to my place, he wanted to stay with us for a while. He really loves us. The day he came, my parents went to Penang. The next day he shared all his problem with me & my mother. He told us he was mentally hurt. He talked non stop about his worries. But i think he only shared 20% of his worries. He don't want us to feel bad for him. The next day he kept on asking me for a drive, he said he really wanted to go for a ride with me. But i was busy at that time. I regret. I promised him i will take him for a ride tomorrow. Now i remember few months ago he called me from India & asked me if i have a licence so that when he come to Malaysia i can take him out
Wednesday, at around 8pm my sister called me and asked me to come asap to my father shop. I was shocked as i can hear crying sound at the background. I really can't forgot how i was driving back then, i was shivering, i was scared. I managed to go tho.
My sister told me, my grandpa involved in an accident, a super bike hit him. He was walking back from mosque after magrib prayer. It was just in front of my father's shop, and my brothers all was there, when the accident happened. They were shocked. The bike was super speed so when the accident happened both of them....
The night after the accident, we went to hospital, he was still in the yellow zone. Is it because he was old? He was in a yellow zone even he was so critical. And the super bike guy was in red zone. Even he was not that critical. My grandpa's both arm & leg & eyes & nose and his head was seriously injured.
The next day he was sent to XXX Hospital & all the things they cared about was only money. Only because he was a foreigner so the cost is higher there and the doc was only talking about the cost not how's my grandpa condition. They (doctors) didn't want to touch his head, they wanted us to pay for minor things like leg, arm, nose & eyes. Because they knew if they touch my grandpa head, he can't survive. He is 73 yo. He was really at his maximum & all they cared about was money. The total cost their were talking was about 40 to 50k.
At thursday, 1.55pm he was gone. He can't take it anymore. But he was smiling at the moment. His smile was the sweetest smile ever. We can't even cry when we saw his smiling face. It was hard to believe at the first. But he was called by Allah on the way his was walking back from prayers. MashaAllah.
I really can't go in detail about this. Bye, Assalamualaikum.
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ALL ABOUT ME
This is my page, I can write what I want
Hi guys, there is nothing special about me that i can share here but i will introduce myself. Im Sakinah & im a 99 liner. I really love to spend my time with asian drama especially korean drama. I also enjoy reading manga and novels. So i think there will be entry abt it soon. Now im in my way to become a businesswoman.
Thank you for coming until here
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we can do it
I will share something here soon.
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anything you want to say here
coming soon..
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anything you want to say here
coming soon..soon
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anything you want to say here
coming soon..ssssooonnn
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anything you want to say here
coming soon..soooooon
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my recepi
1. Butter cookies 🍪
click here for the recepi.
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